3.25.2015

Sharing Pregnancy on the Internet + Meet Amanda

Sharing pregnancy on the internet

Consider this your warning... this post is mostly a disorganized mess of all of my complicated thoughts regarding sharing pregnancies on the internet and social media. You can also consider this a disclaimer. These thoughts are my own and what might be best for me might not be best for you- that is to be expected. Since my thoughts are so complicated, I would love for you to share yours in the comments, especially if you're a mom because I obviously am not at that place in my life, and my opinion is subject to change when/if we get there.

Now that we have that out of the way, let me get to the good stuff. I do not think I will share my pregnancy online. At least not on my blog. But as I said above, that is subject to change. There are many reasons for this.

The first reason is privacy. Although I am a blogger and choose to put my life out there on the internet, I do still have boundaries and I am actually a pretty private person. I don't plan to ever write a "mommy blog" so it shouldn't be terribly hard to write about other things, or at least when I do write about motherhood or share on social media, to keep my children's faces and information private.

The next issue concerns safety and security. Similar to Meagan's thoughts on the issue, I worry about photos of my (future) children getting into the wrong hands. There are people on instagram who steal photos of other people's children and share them as their own (and sometimes do worse things with them). Predators also use the internet. Just because blogging is my hobby, that doesn't mean it will be in my children's best interest to be on here. I also work in the mental health field, and clients don't need to see my kids. Although I won't be able to resist sharing on social media, I can resist sharing their faces.

My third reason is kind of silly, but I think it's weird that women share ultrasound photos on the internet. When you think about it, I know pregnancy is beautiful and all, but you are putting your unborn child and uterus out there for everyone to see. This is a SUPER intimate thing I only want to share with my husband, close family and friends. Also, it's kind of weird that everyone has seen a 3D photo of your child before it is even born. Am I alone here?

Fourth, I can't help but feel for all the women who are single, struggling with infertility, or coping with the loss of babies. Now, I know that shouldn't prevent someone from sharing in their excitement, but I think it should be at least thoughtfully acknowledged.

Because there are two sides to every issue, and as I have said my thoughts are complicated, I do go back and forth on this issue. Mostly because when the time comes for us to have children, I know I will be really excited and want to share with my blogger friends. I also know, however, that I can still share with those bloggers I know well via e-mail, etc.

I know there are plenty of people who choose to share their pregnancies and children online and I am not judging them for that.We each have our own ways of doing things, and this will likely be mine.

I also recognize it might be weird to all of a sudden have a child, but that is something I am willing to deal with as it comes. It's likely my pregnancy won't stay a total secret, but it probably won't be on my blog. I know this seems extreme, but the safety and security of my family is important to me. And all of this being said, I AM NOT PREGNANT. Promise.

Did/will you share your pregnancy online? How do/will you deal with issues such as safety and security when it comes to your children?
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Today the lovely Amanda from Knock on Wood is joining us! Amanda is a fellow Missourian who actually only lives an hour or so away from me! I'm excited for the day we actually get to meet because this lady has a huge heart and the cutest dog in the world that I might dog-nap. Shhhh. Take it away Amanda!
Hello Sage readers! I'm Amanda and I blog over at Knock on Wood. You can find anything from love and relationship topics to recipes and life tips there, and if I haven't blogged about it and you want to read about it, let me know and I'll get right on that. I'm pretty sure the posts about my furkids and my crazy conversations with Hubs (and other people) are everyone's favorites. I'm kicking Cassie out for a moment because she wants me to answer these very important questions. So here it goes.

1. What are you passionate about? 
Helping people. This is why my job is so perfect for me; I'm a Certified Medical Assistant (CMA) at a local long term assisted living facility for senior citizens. My residents have awesome stories to tell and can offer some great life advice. Just because they are "old" doesn't mean they don't have their wits about them. This is also why I chose Psychology as my major when I decided to go back to school. Since starting my job, I think I want to work with seniors as well as offer marriage and relationship counseling.

2. If you could travel to one place in the entire world, where would it be and why? 
England. I went there once in 2008 and I fell in love. There is so much history and amazing architecture, and so many things I wasn't able to see and experience. I think I need an entire year there to explore everything to my satisfaction.

3. If you could learn to do anything, what would it be and why? 
To communicate with my furkids. Seriously, sometimes I really really want to know what they are thinking or needing. When Bear was sick last week, I would have given anything to know for sure what was making him feel yucky! And my cats are always meowing about something.



4. Would you like to know the day you’re going to die ahead of time? Why or why not?
Oh, this is a hard one. On one hand I would, so I can make sure I get in everything I absolutely want to do. But on the other, I don't. I wouldn't want that looming over me and my family every single day. You know, let's go with no. We should live every day like it could be our last. Each one we get is such a blessing.

5. What’s something you wish everyone knew about you?
That I can be honest to a fault, and sometimes I say things harshly/frankly without realizing I am. Most of the time I am only trying to help, but it can come off as something entirely different. I am working on this, so if you experience something like this, please please let me know, so I can explain further what I was trying to say and so that it is brought to my attention. That way I'll be able to catch myself before I say something like that again. My Husband does this with me, and it's helped us understand each other so much better.

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78 comments :

  1. I am not pregnant either but am very back and forth on this topic as well. You made some really strong points. And not to be super negative or anything, but I'd be worried that I'd get so caught up in sharing the news and blogging about nothing besides pregnancy and then something bad would happen like a miscarriage or something. Again, not trying to think of bad things, but it is reality and happens. For some people, if that happens it could be therapeutic for them to blog about their experience if that were to happen but for some people, it could make it that much worse.

    http://dogmomchic.blogspot.com/

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  2. I always thought the 3D photo thing was weird. Plus, super expensive! In general, I don't mind pregnancy information mostly people aren't thinking about the details of it (my uterus, etc), just the baby. But I do think it gets a little out of hand these days.

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  3. I totally agree. There are two sides to everything so what might be helpful for one person, might not be for another. Thanks for contributing!

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  4. I totally agree with you on this! I'm so back and forth - I have no idea what I will do probably until the time comes lol!

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  5. I'm really glad you shared this because I love hearing what other people have to say about this. for me I'm obviously an over sharer. is always been that way even during my pregnancy with zander in 2009. I posted belly pictures and everything. my husband and I have talked about lessening the shares we have on social media just because it's being more and more ridiculous with the creeps out there. 5 years ago it didn't seem that bad. I think for us it's a constant revaluation. if that makes sense. I completely support those like you that prefer not to share. much respect!

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  6. This is such an amazing post Cassie! I honestly don't think I will either, that's if I'm still blogging when the time comes. I'm so happy you included the forth reason, it's something that most people don't take into consideration. As I grow older I find it crazy how so many people just openly ask others "So when are you going to have kids? / You should be trying by now!". To me, it's just the same as asking someone how old they are. Rude. You don't know that person's story or what they are going through.

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  7. Also, LOVE Amanda :) She's the sweetest gal ever.

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  8. I think it's good you have this stance and I do appreciate you thinking of those who are going through infertility. That honestly means a lot because I can it seems like until someone goes through it, it's something they NEVER think about it, So THANK YOU!


    I think we are in such a different boat since EVERYONE knows about our infertility journey, and that is the whole reason I started our blog. I will be sharing the details because it WILL BE A MIRACLE FROM GOD! I want him to get ALL the Glory! Our testimonies create the environment for God to repeat the miracle and I can't wait to share and encourage others who are also struggling (when that time comes)!!! I think it's great that you don't want to and I certainly don't think there is anything wrong with not sharing!

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  9. Thank you for being sensitive to those who struggle with loss and/or infertility!!! Seriously, I am so thankful when someone acknowledges that! I don't ever expect people to just not share for that reason, they should be able to share as much of their joy as they want to! But it helps so much when someone is just sensitive to it. I agree the approach to whether to share online will be different for everyone, but I love your reasons for not sharing, they make perfect sense!

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  10. I have similar thoughts on the subject. My sister, cousin, & best friend chose not to share their pregnancies on social media: no announcements, ultrasound pictures, nothing. And I loved that. One of my friend's delivered her child stillborn last summer; it was a tragic, terrible thing, and my heart breaks for her. She had shared her entire pregnancy online and once there was no baby, the questions started pouring in... I can't imagine how heartbreaking that was for her. Seeing her go through that made me want to guard myself. I'm a little old-fashioned and private, too.

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  11. I think it has everything to do with what kind of blogger you are. I am 100% personal with my blog because I love to use it as a type of journal through my life and share all of the ups and downs I get to experience. During the past year I tried to do less personal posts and have fashion, giveaways, and reviews on different products but I always felt like I was missing something and after several months I realized I missed my voice. I missed my stories and my heart behind what I writing. I'm not saying that bloggers that do write that type of content can't have a heart behind their words, but for me, I felt disconnected. When I made the decision to switch back to my personal writing and not focus on the amount of posts but the quality of posts I noticed that my readers seemed much happier because that is what they grew to love. That was the reason I began blogging in the first place. So, with all that said, I can't imagine not sharing my pregnancy and all the details because that is the type of blogger I am. I have dreamed of being a "mommy blogger" for a very long time… but that is also one of the best things about blogging. It is YOUR space to do what you love and share what you love to share. So, you do YOU because this is YOUR space!!
    Love you bunches and I can't wait to hug your neck TONIGHT!

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  12. This is something I've thought about too. There are areas of my life that I prefer to keep quiet-- finances, work details, schooling-- and pregnancy may be one of them as well. I won't be pregnant for a while, but when I am I may feel the urge to reflect on certain things, but I don't plan on sharing a ton of nitty-gritty details either. So I actually can really relate to what you've written here! That said, I can't say I don't enjoy reading other bloggers' pregnancy posts-- at least the bloggers that I feel really connected to.

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  13. firstly, i completely agree with you on the oversharing of pregnancy on social media (among other topics). there is a definite line, and it is crossed WAY too often. i also hear you on the safety and security thing, everyone has their boundaries with that topic and i totally get you. other than that, i completely disagree with you :) mostly because you refer to pregnancy and motherhood as "topic" that you can just avoid. now, this is totally something that i thought before i got pregnant, but when you are growing a human, it takes over. whether in a good way or a bad way, it's not really something that you just don't think about. how you eat, how you work out, how you dress, all of it relates back to your pregnant bod. so if you can somehow have a lifestyle blog without mentioning it, i'll be impressed and happily proven wrong! 3D ultrasound weirdness aside, i suppose sharing ultrasounds could be odd, but it's a baby already, even if it's not outside your body yet, so i don't really get what's weird about it at the same time...i've seen some arguments for not sharing your pregnancy online until the baby is here for the reason that "something bad might happen" and that makes me so heartsick. to not share happiness out of a fear of heartbreak is a sad way to live, and after talking to friends who have lost babies early or late, miscarriage or stillborn, none wish that they hadn't told people, in fact, most say they wish that more people had known so they could address their loss without a whole explanation of "oh yes, i was pregnant, but now i'm not".

    all my opinion, but as a person who has actually been pregnant (i think there are only a couple who have commented so far), i can tell you that it's a lot different than you ever expect it to be. :) p.s. you and your husband are going to make some cute babies someday...

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  14. I think it's awesome that you share and that you and your husband talk about it regularly and take it as it comes! To each their own!

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  15. I can relate to getting asked that question! I usually don't mind when it's close friends or family but with others I agree it's striking

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  16. You're welcome.


    Also, I think God uses each of us differently. I think it's awesome that this is all a part of your testimony!

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  17. I agree with you. I think the blogging world has made me more sensitive to loss and infertility. Or maybe it's just getting older. Either way, I know that should never stop someone from sharing but for me it just contributes to the other reasons why I wouldn't want to share :)

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  18. I can't even imagine that. At the same time, I know the blogging world can be an incredible support system and honestly if I experienced loss or infertility after we started trying, I might share just so others feel like they aren't alone and because I know I will probably need some extra love.

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  19. Absolutely! I'm totally cool with being personal on here about most things, but I mostly worry for safety and adding children to the mix just makes things messy and complicated. I know I'll be excited and it will be hard not to share, but I don't know. Complicated feelings.

    YAY I SEE YOU SO SOON!

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  20. I agree. I like staying up to date on bloggers that are my close friends, but for those that aren't I sometimes just skip over them, because when they fill in the "gender" space with the same thing ever week (like will it be changing?!?!) it can get old since I'm not at that place in my life yet. And I'm totally with you about not sharing about certain things. My job requires me to be VERY cognizant of what I put online so that impacts a lot of my decisions about blog content. Glad you can relate.

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  21. Someone I know said that after they lost their baby (through
    miscarriage), they were sad they hadn't told very many people, because
    then no one got to share in their initial excitement and thus didn't
    understand or sympathize with their pain as much after they lost the
    baby. So I can see how sharing and then having that support after would
    be worth it, even though there are questions to deal with later that
    will be painful.

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  22. I agree with you about the possibility of things changing and I'm open to that. I understand that motherhood becomes a part of who you are. I also see your point about refering to pregnancy as a topic, and maybe I
    misspoke. I refer to it in the sense that I won't be talking about how
    to parent, not that it wouldn't be a HUGE topic in my life. It's something I would be careful about putting on my blog for all of the other reasons listed. A large part of it is related to my job. I'm willing to share a lot about myself, but I can't say I will feel the same about my kids.

    Also, I would never NOT share for the fear of something bad happening. I don't think like that- and I know that God is completely in control. I also fully recognize the need to have community supporting you when something like that happens. So I completely agree with you there. My heart aches for women that feel like they have to carry that loss alone.

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  23. Also, related to ultrasounds, I really just feel personally that they should be shared with close friends and family. If people feel otherwise I'm totally cool with that- it's just personal preference I suppose!

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  24. Super interesting topic! I have to say, @hooleywithaz makes an excellent point about pregnancy. Even though I won't be sharing weekly bump updates or ultrasound pictures (I agree that for me it's kind of personal, and the 3D ones freak me out!), being pregnant really does change *everything* about how you eat, what you do, what you think about, etc., and completely leaving that out of my blog wouldn't work.

    For example, I used to blog much more about running, and now that I'm pregnant my running has changed so much. I feel like it would be impossible to post a race recap and NOT be able to explain why my time suddenly dropped 40 minutes slower unless I just straight-up lied about my finishing time. Plus, so many of the people who read and comment on my blog have become like real friends, and it was fun to share our news with them.

    That said, I am still on the fence about sharing Baby Bum's name on the blog. We definitely aren't going to share before he/she is born anyway, but even after that I still don't know. There is a definite stalker factor that you have to be aware of, sad but true.

    (Sorry, this comment is forever long.) As for the infertility, because of Jordan's and my (albeit brief) struggle, I am so much more sensitive to this issue. I think it's fine to share and be excited, but what I personally found frustrating was when people posted their announcement and then followed it with, "And it was so easy! We can't believe how fast this happened!" That may be true, but I feel like saying that is insensitive to people for whom it was/is NOT easy at all. There are ways to announce while still be sensitive to those who struggle.

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  25. Something I didn't realize was that your SSN is printed ON some of the ultrasound pics! So bloggers gotta watch out for that if they do post them, because hello stolen identity.

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  26. Just thinking about the topic thing more too. I don't intend to never share about motherhood but I just don't want it to be the only content on my blog. I also feel like I can share without showing photos of my kids faces and giving too any details. So it's not that I will totally avoid the topic because like you said that's totally impossible.

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  27. I mostly agree with you. It is super complicated and I am sure my feelings will change and I am sure I wi be so excited too but all your worries? I think about that too. No question. Way to handle this honestly and delicately.

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  28. I've thought quite a bit about this topic too, because we don't have kids yet, but I hope I'm still blogging by the time we do start a family! I think I've decided to selectively share things. I think it would be odd if I didn't announce a pregnancy on the blog at all, because obviously it's going to be a big part of our life....but I don't think I'm going to want to share a name for privacy reasons. Part of me would love to share the names we love with the world, but I don't know if it's fair to our future kids' privacy. Plus, I know my parents have tons of pictures of me that I wouldn't necessarily want on the internet, so I think kids in this generation should get that consideration too! Maybe one newborn picture where everyone is fully clothed, then done. Maybe I'll change my mind when the time comes. Such difficult decisions!!

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  29. Yes! I totally understand what you're saying and I acknowledge it will change every aspect of my life. I'll surely be sharing about motherhood but just without oversharing and only close blog friends will know about my pregnancy. I really love how you have been sharing without over sharing, Amanda. I love staying up to date with people in the blogosphere who are pregnant but I'm just not sure it's totally for me!

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  30. Thanks, Nina. The great blogging upset ;)

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  31. Totally! I might share that we are pregnant but not much beyond that and maybe not even on the blog- more in private exchanges. I don't know, it's a fine line to walk and I have totally thought about the same things you bring up!

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  32. Well, if my husband and I have kids, and one is a girl, it will be hard to hide her name since we plan to name her Brita. I've been pretty up-front about that because I know it's an unusual choice.


    In regards to pregnancy on the blog, I will probably try to keep it a secret for as long as possible. As in, I already have plans that when Dan and I start trying to take an unusual amount of fashion pictures and just wait to share some of them for if/when I'm preggers to keep it a secret longer. ;)


    My concerns regarding pregnancy online are interestingly quite different than your own. As a super-feminist pro-choice person who worries about the constant discrimination against pregnant people, I have spent a ridiculous amount of time researching pregnancy, its risks, birth defects, odds of miscarriage, discrimination against pregnant people, unnecessary medical interventions, how to empower pregnant women to make the best choices for their health, etc.


    Which means that I don't know if I want to celebrate a pregnancy publicly only to have a miscarriage or need an abortion for life-threatening issues (for me or the fetus). Am I a little paranoid, considering the statistical likelihood of everything being fine? Maybe. But the health issues in my immediate family defy all statistical odds (my mom has brain cancer, and my twin brother is in remission for brain cancer--just one case is ridiculously rare). Plus I have Crohn's Disease, which can also screw up a pregnancy.


    Ha, and you thought your thoughts on this were scattered...

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  33. I should also add that I really enjoy hearing birth stories, though. I read those all the time. I think it's helpful to know all the different ways to healthily and safely deliver a child. It can help other women make the best decisions for their own birth plans.

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  34. This is something I struggle with too - no...not pregnant either. But it's something I have thought about. And I actually agree with you. I don't think I could do it. I don't think I could post things about pregnancy on my blog, but it is such a life changing thing happening, that I can see why it happens. I go back and forth on this because I know that it would be great to back and remember what I was thinking/feeling while I was pregnant, but I also think I could journal about it separate from the blog.


    But then again, can I really not blog about it? I have no idea because I haven't been in that situation yet. I guess only time will tell if I do get pregnant. I am so torn though.

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  35. You just summarized all of my feelings. Everyone's comments have made me realize I will probably share about motherhood on the blog- not necessarily pregnancy though- without sharing photos of my kids or too much details about them. Pregnancy might be shared on social media but I'm not sure about that either especially since I don't really have strictly personal accounts anymore. So. Many. Feelings.

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  36. I do too and I think you make great points. It's definitely a hard decision to make!

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  37. Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I had never thought about this issue from the point of view you have taken and it was really interesting to read about!

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  38. I see both sides. If/when I have children, I will probably share them about as much as I share other parts of my life (an occasional picture, an update or two, something funny that happened). I would share info about my pregnancy/birth but no graphic details. The only point here that I disagree with is the idea that women should hesitate in sharing their pregnancies because another woman might be struggling with infertility and loss. I don't expect my friends and family to not share photos and updates with their fathers just because I lost my dad. I wouldn't expect anyone to thoughtfully acknowledge my loss when they talk about what a great Father's Day they had. We will all lose someone at some point. I don't think anyone should be expected to justify their joy and happiness for any reason. There is enough sadness and pain in the world. We should all celebrate the good things every chance we get, even if someone else might not have what we have.

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  39. Sorry if you read it as people shouldn't share because others have had losses. That wasn't my point. It was simply that it should be taken into consideration. My heart aches for them even in my joy.

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  40. I agree with many of the things you're saying, but I honestly can't say what I will/won't do when the time comes for me to decide. Obviously my feelings may change. Just like I probably said before I was married, "You will never see me doing XYZ for my husband" and I have actually ended up doing it! You never really know exactly how you'll feel (and this is a general "you" not specifically "you").

    Also, I guess being in the medical field has desensitized me to the more "private" aspects of the body. Those things just don't phase me anymore. Will I announce my pregnancy on social media and my blog? Probably. Will I document weekly "bumpdates" and the like? I really can't answer. I say I won't, because really I'm too inconsistent and I may feel like doing it one week but not the next, but there really is no telling.

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  41. First of all, I just want to say you handled this topic with such grace and class! Secondly, while I have shared my pregnancy online I will be keeping my child private. One of my reasons for sharing my pregnancy is because I shared my two miscarriages - I wanted to share the good news instead of the bad all the time. Also- my blog will not be a mommy blog either. I think this subject is so personal because it really depends on the individual. Know what I mean? Well done girl, well done!

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  42. I know we already discussed this, but I'm with you. Honestly I struggled with not sharing their names, pictures, etc and coming across as not personable. But, in the end, their safety is my number one job in life and if someone thinks less of me for not sharing, then they don't have to read!

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  43. I'm with you on this - I'm faaar from that point in my life to have children, but even now, I don't think I'd share. Mainly for the privacy factor, that you mentioned. I'm even hesitant to share pictures of my family now for that reason. This may sound cynical, but putting your child on the internet puts them at risk for so many things. Who knows though, I may change my mind in the future. This is good food for thought!

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  44. Thanks for sharing this! I'm not pregnant, nor have I ever been, but I've always thought it was weird that people feel so comfortable sharing photos of their babies and young children on the internet. I obviously grew up in a time when social networking and the internet didn't exist, but I just can't help but thinking how uncomfortable I would have been as a teen knowing that my whole life had been broadcast on the internet before I could even understand what it was! Knowing my mother, there would have been some really embarrassing stuff, too. And we all know you can't erase it once it's out there!!

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  45. Well you know I am a huge fan of Amanda's and LOVE her!


    I can't say what I would do about being pregnant and sharing it on social media because this shop has closed up...won't be happening again....no more kids for me! I can see though where people want to share their pregnancies. Our blogs are a reflection of who we are and where we are in our stage of life. I have shared bits and pieces about my children on my blog as they are my world. I also think that when we share our stories, good and bad, happy and sad, we have the ability to connect with others and perhaps help someone. I have also said that someday my blog will be a piece of me that my kids will read. It not only tells my story but some of theirs as well. I completely get the point though about sharing pictures of kids...not everyone is fine with that and that is completely understandable. I do think though that you won't know exactly how you truly feel until you are in a situation yourself and you may opt to share some details. Regardless...kudos to you for taking a tough topic and stating your opinion so beautifully and judgement free....pure Cassie! Xo

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  46. love this! I've thought a lot about this and (more relevant to my situation) wedding details. I personally think that less is more. But who knows how I will feel when the time comes!

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  47. YES TO ALL OF THIS! I agree with absolutely everything you wrote!

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  48. This is so interesting, and make you some awesome points. I am pregnant (1 day past my due date, YIKES), and I've battled through a lot of these issues before and during pregnancy. I am TOTALLY with you on not posting ultrasound pictures. I'm also super private, and I just wouldn't feel comfortable sharing that.


    When it comes to blogging about pregnancy, I kind of hate the weekly bumpdate (that word alone makes me cringe) posts and all the details. We waited until the second trimester to share anything, and I've kept it vague. I've mainly just written about the crazy things I've done due to my hormones, how morning sickness put me in the hospital, and how I'm dealing with the fact that a huge life change is coming (YAY! but also YIKES). I've left all the personal/medical details off my blog, and I would never share them online.


    The one thing that gets me, and the one thing I'm not sure how I'll handle yet, are baby pictures. People post SO many pictures of their kids online, and sometimes it makes me really nervous for them. There are creeps everywhere! I don't want to not share any pictures, but I want to be really careful about it. I also think about how grateful I am that my mom wasn't throwing any and all pictures of me as a baby and kid online when I was little. I don't know how much I would appreciate it now, and I want to keep that in mind with my own daughter.

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  49. SO many good points, I feel like I'm pretty open to sharing...but not quite sure what I would do while being pregnant. I do believe that some things are meant to be private, but some things are fun to share. Great post and discussion!

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  50. Dance With A DollyMarch 26, 2015 at 7:42 PM

    You make completely legitimate points here. I started my blog after I already had Liv but I think I would find the need to share some stuff about my pregnancy if it happens again, although you would not see me doing monthly bump updates. I do share photos of my daughter and some stories that involve her because she is the most important thing in my life. But my whole blog does not revolve around her but I cannot picture it being authentic if I never talked about her. I completely understand the safety issue but it's no different than people sharing photos on Facebook and Instagram. Even if your profile is private people can get photos. I wonder how many people who say they wouldn't share on their blog would also not share any images on social media at all. But that being said you made completely valid points on why not to share and I respect all those who share those feelings. Who knows maybe one day I will completely cross to your side. ;)

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  51. I really appreciate the way you share things about your daughter. It's done very tastefully. And I don't have a Facebook but these feelings translate there as well :) it's just such a fine line between sharing enough to be authentic and sharing too much. Thanks for sharing your thoughts!

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  52. Thanks Emelia, I totally agree.

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  53. So glad it's not only me with the ultrasound photos. I think the manner I share with be similar to yours. I don't want to do bump dates publicly, but maybe in a private journal. It's crazy How many photos people share of their kids online. Like entire posts dedicated to 50+ photos! and I agree! you never know wander those photos will end up.

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  54. Hahah you're so funny. Also, I love how you share your kids! I want readers to know I'm a mom but not necessarily think of my blog as a mom blog. I think you have a great balance and I definitely admire how you have chosen to share!

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  55. YES! Once it's on the internet you no longer own it.

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  56. That's so true. I don't think it's cynical, I think it's realistic! My children's safety will be my number one priority!

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  57. I couldn't agree more. I think you still share in a way that is authentic and I'm hoping I'll be able to find a similar balance!

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  58. I love both the way and the amount you have shared! I'm happy you feel similarly so that I can follow your example :)

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  59. You're so right about the marriage thing and I'm totally open to the idea that my thoughts might change. I love that this post has gotten people thinking about the subject even if that's not necessarily in their near future. Thanks for sharing!

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  60. Cassie, thank you for effectively yet gently slaying the elephant in the room. I think it was very brave of you to tackle a topic that many people are thinking about, but are afraid to share for fear of judgement or that they'll be viewed as insensitive. I'm a single gal and often joke with my single friends that there's gotta be an app or plugin to remove all of the ultrasound, baby bump and first time on the potty posts that spread like wildfire around the inter webs. And by saying that, in no way does that mean that I'm not happy and excited for the women that post them, but I also do not want my life bombarded by the realities of what my life has yet to hold.

    I also currently feel, as you do, that sharing these type of posts welcome others into private moments and can provide potential risks that are not necessary. Of course, when I finally meet the one (that seems to be eluding me - haha!) and start growing my own bump, I'll be tempted to share these things as well. I guess only time will tell. Nonetheless, thank you for providing others the opportunity to think more thoroughly about this and discuss their thoughts. Be blessed!

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  61. yay it's amanda and that big beautiful bear! love it!


    yeah...i have mixed feelings about sharing pregnancy. i think that i will talk about it because my blog involves relationships and marriage so i know this will have a heavy impact on our marriage should we decide to have children.


    then you started talking about all the safety issues and i got paranoid so maybe i need to reconsider some of what i share too. i personally find reading about pregnancy on other people's blog SUPER interesting because it's so foreign to me!

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  62. I'm paranoid too, but really only about this. Something about adding children changes things!!

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  63. Thank you for your thoughtful comment. I've lost a few followers over this one, but it did definitely need to be tackled.

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  64. And if you ever find that app let me know ;)

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  65. I feel like I'm the odd one out. I'm not pregnant and haven't been, but plan to be within the next 18 months if things go well. Like Melissa I'm an over-sharer. And like someone else said I use the blog sort of as a journal to track my life's happenings - being pregnant would be a pretty big happening so it would be VERY weird for me to NOT share it. Like right now stuff is happening at work that I wish I could write about, but I can't, because it's work and I can get in big trouble for it.


    I also use it for my family around the world to be able to stay up to date on what is going on in my life.


    I totally get your point and understand what you are saying here - but I am not worried about having my baby or uterus for that matter "out" there. I'm respectful of those who are worried or don't want to share.


    I actually do like reading the "bump" dates and look forward to doing them - even if you skip over them. I'm doing them for myself more-so than for readers.

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  66. To each their own right? I've moved away from having my blog just be a journal because that's what works for me, but that's all personal preference.

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  67. quite a fascinating post and I love your honesty. Loved reading it and the comments! I've thought of this often and there will be a point to which I will likely share some things just due to when it happens some day it will be a big part of my life but I also feel that these days there can often be over sharing. Pregnancy is a beautiful thing to celebrate but I don't want to just be all about that. So yeah, we'll see how it happens. :) My husband and I have often talked about setting lines too for what we share about our children out of respect to them and security issues. I do not want potty pictures haunting them in their teens on social media. There's balance to be found but I think it's a personal journey for everyone.

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  68. Thanks so much for taking the time to share your thoughts. Pregnancy is definitely an amazing thing, but I'm with you on not wanting that to completely take over. HAHAHAH potty pics. Poor, poor children of the 2000s.

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  69. I think about this ALL THE TIME. I don't mind the kid pictures but totally understand the safety concerns. I'm not sure how I feel about them when I think of my own kids, butttttttt, for now, I am not afraid.

    The ultrasounds though, SO WITH YOU. I always think THAT'S YOUR INSIDES. I know it's a baby picture but THAT'S YOUR INSIDES.

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  70. I think after seeing what happened to Kate (the Florkens) I am even more scared to share photos! And YES weird ultrasound photos!! hahaha

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